I think this goes here... Rated for Language - I am not so sure on the fragmented beginning. All comments, suggestions, welcome. As for the title is comes from two poems by Sylvia Plath, Lorelei and Lyonnesse. Some of the lines allude to similar lines in both.
And Lorelei: A Reflection on Reading Lyonnesse
fair ivory-ash hair
pulled away by
cream-satin,
jutting
high cheekbones.
knees under suffocating silk
are serrated planes of glass -
elbows bent and
tired from attending to this
foul-faggot tug of war.
between the hubris loch
and the bitter incestuous crown
writhing: helpless, hopeless, and –
barren.
fools, they called you a goddess of peace
in a cage of stars, spider water wing rivulets
laving the skin – a bright white sparkling light.
they thought heaven would be different,
though they couldn’t see the burns on your
toes.
I am only a mortal Mab
but take my hand, let
me purge this haunting shade.
And
sweet sister, sleep –
just sleep.
____________________________________
me thinks I've been reading too much Plath.
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
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the rest of the poem is fragmented and chopped up, but this part isn't. it doesn't flow. perhaps line breaks would assit it with that.
i didn't like this ending. it drifted far too much.